It is possible...

To crash a sharepoint site in the middle of a busy conference day!  I have come to learn that you can only have 5000 records in a single list.  SMU has the best OIT Help Desk people and we got back up and running by 8:15 this morning. 

Sounds easy enough....

                  I wish I believed this
                  I wish I hadn't spend all this time thinking it was selfish to want anything everything for myself

Transformation....in progress!  I finally have the strength to be my own editor and will rewrite this story, word for word, if I have to.

5 *Simple Things-Repost

Be Grateful
Act With Love
Check Your Motives
Watch Your Attitude
Forgive

It's not lost on me that the last two things listed seem to be the most difficult lately.  But, what a great reminder of how grace is not difficult unless we chose to ignore just how simple it really is.  Thank you Katie M'Lady!

Single Mom- no more

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/denise-albert/divorce-diaries-dont-call_b_1498191.html

Single Mom will never cross my lips again! Well said, sister! The only thing she missed (probably because she was trying to make a point) is that for all the days where I do absolutely EVERYTHING...I now have days where I can't do anything for my son and have no choice but to focus on myself (which I never did as a married mom). I make the most of it so that my son sees me as not just a mom that can do everything but also a woman that can do anything. Run races, hike the grand canyon, sew, knit, being a great friend, a valuable addition to my team at work and actually read things that make me a smarter and more interesting woman.

Formerly Married Mom FMM, Available Mom, whatever...just not a single mom!

I used to feel it was an insult to me to be called a single mom, and compared to never married moms. Yes, I can be a snob (not proud of that, just stating a fact). I actually still wore my wedding rings whenever we traveled because I whole heartedly believed that people treated me better.  I look young for my age and the way that people treat young, unwed mothers in this state is not something to be proud of Texas!  It is an insult to the real single moms who do EVERYTHING on their own. Compared to them, I get a girls, spa, me-time weekend, every-other weekend. No guilt, no paying someone to watch him. The sadness went away when I admitted that our son deserved and needed time with his Dad, even though that meant it would be time away from me.

Giving Myself Permission to be Sad...

I read articles from the Divorce page on the Huffington Post, almost every day.  Some are validating, some are informative, some are petty…but, this one really hit me.  It probably doesn’t make sense because this actually made me feel better.  Saying it’s ok to be incredibly sad and confused for a while.  Know that this sadness I am feeling is mine and no one else is responsible for it.  It just is what it is.

Rachael Harris- The Daily Show

It was still really… I don’t know if you’ve ever been through that, but for me, it was a huge transition. It was really painful. I had conflicting feelings about it. I knew it was the right thing to do, but I still loved my husband tremendously," Harris said, adding that she found Linda's realization that she was living alone especially relatable:

When I went back to my house, and the house was completely empty -- I had moved out when my husband figured out what he was going to do, and then I moved back into the house, and everything of his was gone -- there’s a moment in the film when Linda goes back to the house and she’s brushing her teeth. And that moment when -- she has a double-sink -- she has to turn the other sink on to feel okay, I completely related to that. That floored me. There’s this quiet emptiness that is awful.

Keep It In the Pantry

Why do I have so much food in my Pantry? It's just me...and picky McPicky eater! I come by it honestly (remember my Noni's Pantry)?  But, things need to change. I started by organizing my cupboards.

Operation: STOP buying food and "whip up dinner out of what you have" has begun.

Stay tuned for posts with the impromptu "recipes" if they taste good!

Braised Brussels Sprouts

I have a new love of greens, green-greens! I will post some more of my recent dishes (black bean soup with Mustard Greens, Brussels Sprouted green leaves with spinach)  Before anyone disses me about these, they are just little cabbages, people! If you like cabbage, you like Brussels Sprouts!! The Dijon mustard glaze at the end is what makes it a second helping dish.

See the full recipe HERE

List Cont.

1. food that I won't eat within the next 7 days while I am at the store
2. shorts- I got them all out last night to take inventory of what fits and what I could donate and I have PLENTY of shorts....even though I am always keeping my eye out for the perfect pair of sexy jean shorts.  I'm 39, repeat that 39 turning 40!  Sexy jean shorts are for young girls.
3. earring
4. swim suits- I have effectively replaced the suits that were DEMOLISHED by my Grand Canyon trip
5. any booking, baking or kitchen equipment

Lists

March is for purging and April will be focused living in my budget for a few months.  Crossing my fingers that something big doesn't come along that will cost me a lot of unexpected dollars or time off from work.  I have to remind myself why I don't have time (or play money) saved up at work right now....an amazing 8 day rafting trip through the Grand Canyon.  The trip of a lifetime is going to have to keep on giving for a while!  So, I have decided that I need to keep a list of things I think that I "want" or "need" and actively chose to go without them.  Here's a start

1. 2 more chairs for my dinning room table (we don't even eat there)
2. shoes (I have plenty)
3. running shorts/workout clothes (more than plenty)
4. Trains or toys for Trevor (he has plenty)
5. purses (I broke my resolution but that doesn't mean I need to keep breaking it)
6. nail polish (I have at least 20- 3 of which are Chanel- and I hardly ever paint my nails)
7. more to come....

Decuttering March

I got started a little early with Project Simplify, the first week is the Kid's room and I got after it!!  It is particularly obvious that we have way too much stuff since Trevor's birthday is one month after Christmas.

Of course, I did do this while he was not at home.  He was actually super excited at his clean and newly organized room.  I made sure to display some things that he had forgotten about and he loved seeing those when he walked in.  He is accustomed to me cleaning and organizing, so that wasn't a shock.  He asked me "Mommy, why did you put all my trains on the shelf?", I responded "well, when your trains are all over the place and a mess it makes Mommy crazy".  He said "when you put my trains on the shelf it makes ME crazy"!  Such a funny moment for both of us.

I started with toys. Duplicates of toys (we had 3 sets of tools, 2 wooden trains etc). Then, I moved to the bookshelf and took out all the baby books (save his first few favorite books). The easiest were the bins of Happy Meal and birthday party favors. Worthless!

I have kept a box of infant, non choking hazard toys in the guest room closet since I still have friends with infants. One of the benefits of being totally on board with having one child is that you can purge without thinking you might need it later!

I took all of our declutter project items to the Genesis Women's Shelter Thrift Store in Dallas.