One of the many reasons I love Tina Fey

“First, Lord: No tattoos. May neither Chinese symbol for truth nor Winnie-the-Pooh holding the FSU logo stain her tender haunches.
May she be Beautiful but not Damaged, for it’s the Damage that draws the creepy soccer coach’s eye, not the Beauty.

When the Crystal Meth is offered, may she remember the parents who cut her grapes in half And stick with Beer.

Guide her, protect her when crossing the street, stepping onto boats, swimming in the ocean, swimming in pools, walking near pools, standing on the subway platform, crossing 86th Street, stepping off of boats, using mall restrooms, getting on and off escalators, driving on country roads while arguing, leaning on large windows, walking in parking lots, riding Ferris wheels, roller-coasters, log flumes, or anything called “Hell Drop,” “Tower of Torture,” or “The Death Spiral Rock ‘N Zero G Roll featuring Aerosmith,” and standing on any kind of balcony ever, anywhere, at any age.

Lead her away from Acting but not all the way to Finance. Something where she can make her own hours but still feel intellectually fulfilled and get outside sometimes And not have to wear high heels. What would that be, Lord? Architecture? Midwifery? Golf course design? I’m asking You, because if I knew, I’d be doing it, Youdammit.

May she play the Drums to the fiery rhythm of her Own Heart with the sinewy strength of her Own Arms, so she need Not Lie With Drummers.

Grant her a Rough Patch from twelve to seventeen.Let her draw horses and be interested in Barbies for much too long, For childhood is short – a Tiger Flower blooming Magenta for one day – And adulthood is long and dry-humping in cars will wait.

O Lord, break the Internet forever, that she may be spared the misspelled invective of her peers And the online marketing campaign for Rape Hostel V: Girls Just Wanna Get Stabbed.

And when she one day turns on me and calls me a Bitch in front of Hollister, Give me the strength, Lord, to yank her directly into a cab in front of her friends, For I will not have that Shit. I will not have it.

And should she choose to be a Mother one day, be my eyes, Lord, that I may see her, lying on a blanket on the floor at 4:50 A.M., all-at-once exhausted, bored, and in love with the little creature whose poop is leaking up its back. “My mother did this for me once,” she will realize as she cleans feces off her baby’s neck. “My mother did this for me.” And the delayed gratitude will wash over her as it does each generation and she will make a Mental Note to call me. And she will forget. But I’ll know, because I peeped it with Your God eyes.

Amen.”
-Tina Fey

Despair

Definition of DESPAIR

: to lose all hope or confidence

Synonyms: despond, lose heart
Antonyms: brighten, cheer (up), perk (up)
 
I would like an antonym day, please!

Priorities...

Baseball game #2 is going to have to wait.  I am chosing margarita's, a designated driver and 80's music over baseball.  Getting excited for the Glass Cactus tomorrow night :)  The hard part will be getting up for spinning on Saturday morning.

Baseball

I have a goal of 10 baseball games this season...Opening Day was a good start. I am thinking Friday night for the Royals might be #2. I struggle with over scheduling my weekends and never feeling rested. I will just need to make sure i give myself time for a nap on Saturday!

Trevor's 2 Year Pictures

Trevor's 2 Year Photos HERE

Photography by: Renee (Auntie Rae) Gibson

Opening Day!

It was a glorious day.  Rangers/Red Sox, beautiful weather, free tickets, one of my best besties, good friends to take Trevor and the MOST hilarious stories.  It was AWESOME.  I have a goal of at least 10 games this season.  That would be 10 more than I went to last year (awful)! 

Justin Bieber

More of Trevor's 2 year old photos to come!
As soon as Renee took this one she said "it's his Bieber pose"!
Someone call us an agent!

Aunts!

Trevor has the best Aunts! We loved having Cori visit for Spring Break and she didn't even mind that her party cupcakes were Elmo...Trevor HAD to have them....even thought he won't eat them.
Click HERE for our Cori St. Patty's Day, Baby fest!

Opening Day

I don't think Trevor is quite ready for Opening Day yet...or, maybe I am not quite ready for the production involved in getting 2 year old to and from a Rangers Game!!  But, maybe...just maybe we will go to a Red Sox game :)  I do have memories of baseball from when I was very little.  Cubs games with Noni & Papa, watching Les play baseball, watching my Papa keep score at the games, watching every Cubs game on TV and pulling tickets to see who won some money off the score, watching every beer keg softball tournament my Dad organized and being in Little League baseball (it was too small of a town to have separate teams for girls).  I was a terrible baseball player, I might be a guy's girl but I am not a tomboy.  My Dad's softball leagues were always very social but he was also fiercely competitive and the game mattered to him.

As I look back on my relationships I am reminded of the movie Runaway Bride.  Do I always eat my eggs the way my current partner eats his eggs (or in Darren's case, not at all)?  I guess it is somewhat true.  Adaptability is one of my strengths.  Why is it that as a woman if you adapt yourself in your relationship that it is a weakness?  I need to figure that one out.  But, I haven't been on a mountain bike since I lived with Gordon.  I wore Tom's Boston Celtics t-shirts in High School and I don't even like basketball.  I had a brief moment of thinking that maybe my love of baseball had something to do with Darren's love of baseball.  But, it's not that simple.  I really do love baseball.  I did learn and master keeping score at the games while dating Darren.  It was partly survival.  Getting to the park early to watch batting practice and never leaving, regardless of the score can take some effort for someone as "butterfly" as me.  Keeping score makes EVERY at bat interesting, regardless of the score.  It uses my strategic side and although my creative side is structured and neat it is the perfect kind of creativity for keeping score.  Did you know that there is no ONE way to keep score, unless you are an official scorekeeper??  Just enough creative license to make it your own.  I have my own score book that I take with me to games.  If you really want to start keeping score the ones in the program are very limited and if you have your own book you have all your games in one place.  I once saw a leather bound score book that held every single game that a man had been to up for auction...I would totally buy that!!!

I am really looking forward to teaching Trevor how to keep score.  Maybe he will want a book like the one I saw up for auction?  Or, he will think his Mom is a total dork and love ballet.  Either way, I will love him and love whatever he loves...Runaway Bride, meet Runaway Mom!

Groupon

I think I need to set aside a sub line item in my "entertainment" fund for Groupons.  I have already bought 2 today :)
Tart Bakery- Dallas